![]() They bear witness to your transformation and growth. A great mentor delights in seeing the mentee flourish. Rooted in the master-apprentice relationship, mentorship is often thought of as a wholly professional experience. We all thought we were special because that’s how he made people feel. With his undivided attention, encouragement, and big heart, he made each and every one of us feel like his favorite child. It’s the kind of posthumous revelation that cracks the sadness open, makes me smile. After hearing the news, we coalesced for the first time ever-on Zoom, of course-and I quickly learned something new about my friend Rich. I, along with many other of Rich’s mentees, are grieving for the man who made us. And it’s a reminder of the limitations of the mental health field. And he also struggled with bipolar disorder for much of his life. His suicide is a testament to the tenacious nature of mental illness. He was social and loved to connect people to one another. He was a bon vivant, a showman. He began every conference with a cabaret. He wasn’t well-known in other circles, but in the world of psychotherapy, Rich was a giant-an innovator who wrote about mental health and the field with a journalist’s sensibility. He made me write eleven versions of the original article that eventually led to my first book, Mating in Captivity. He encouraged me to put my ideas about love and desire on paper. I wouldn’t be where I am without him. I wouldn’t have believed I could write without him. Rich, editor of Psychotherapy Networker and host of the publication’s eponymous conference, was my friend, colleague, and teacher. Talk about people, not cases.” These were some of the key messages I learned from my mentor, Rich Simon, who died last month.
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